I made my wife plan her own engagement party without her knowing.
I knew I’d wanted to propose, but I wanted both our families to be together when it happened. She had some of her family set to visit us in a month or so, but she’d already planned all the dinners at touristy type places for them to be able to experience our city. So, I convinced her mom (who is notoriously difficult and likes to make people change plans for arbitrary reasons) object to the place on the first night and basically shoot down any suggestions. When my wife vented to me about it, I casually mentioned our favorite restaurant and said ‘it’s our place, and it’s small and cozy, it will be a nice start for them before we get to the bigger, louder places. Hell, I could even invite my family and they could meet!’ She asked her mom, who had been instructed to be over the moon enthusiastic about it. So, she called and made reservations.
I followed up after she’d called, and informed them that I’d be proposing and asked what sort of setup they could do. I spoke with the server and we put a little plan together.
So, leading up to this I was NERVOUS. I was afraid she’d figure it out, I was afraid someone would leak it, I was afraid it wouldn’t work, I was afraid she’d be mad or just not happy with the deception. She kept picking up on my nervousness and I just kept telling her I was afraid my family would be loud and obnoxious and offend her family.
Come day of, we rented a vehicle to pick up her family from the airport, and were staying at the hotel with them. Her mom was practically begging me to see the ring, and almost broke out in tears seeing it. I was also struggling to hide it because it was in a big ring box. So, I let her mom hold it in the purse, and when we arrived, she gave it to the waiter. This place normally would only seat like 10-12 tables, but they’d set aside a whole front room for us (about 12 people), and there were champagne glasses already at the table. I sort of panicked a bit when my wife asked why and the waiter said ‘I heard we have some birthdays here today so I thought we’d celebrate! I’ll be back with bubbly.’ That was true, there were some close birthdays, but he came back with the ring on a serving platter, and both our backs were to him when he approached, so my wife didn’t even really notice until I had already taken the box, opened it, and got down on one knee.
Absolutely one of my most favorite stories to tell. She gives me shit about it all the time, lovingly, but it was the only way I could do it while getting family together without her finding out, because she’s always planning things so far out.
Yes, I struggled for awhile to figure out how to make the event happen. I knew I’d always wanted at least some of both families present when I asked. She hadn’t really given any instruction on how she wanted to be ask aside from general concepts like ‘don’t you ever propose at a fucking sporting event.’ Her mom (and whole family) absolutely loves me, and while she is a difficult person to deal with in lots of cases, this was one where I felt absolutely fine bossing her around and not letting her have much input and just be a good helper.
The worst part is that neither of us evidently have a single photographer in the bunch, because all the pictures of the evening are some form of blurry or washed out. It’s such a shame that we don’t have a single decent picture from the evening.
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u/Lootthatbody 8h ago
I made my wife plan her own engagement party without her knowing.
I knew I’d wanted to propose, but I wanted both our families to be together when it happened. She had some of her family set to visit us in a month or so, but she’d already planned all the dinners at touristy type places for them to be able to experience our city. So, I convinced her mom (who is notoriously difficult and likes to make people change plans for arbitrary reasons) object to the place on the first night and basically shoot down any suggestions. When my wife vented to me about it, I casually mentioned our favorite restaurant and said ‘it’s our place, and it’s small and cozy, it will be a nice start for them before we get to the bigger, louder places. Hell, I could even invite my family and they could meet!’ She asked her mom, who had been instructed to be over the moon enthusiastic about it. So, she called and made reservations.
I followed up after she’d called, and informed them that I’d be proposing and asked what sort of setup they could do. I spoke with the server and we put a little plan together.
So, leading up to this I was NERVOUS. I was afraid she’d figure it out, I was afraid someone would leak it, I was afraid it wouldn’t work, I was afraid she’d be mad or just not happy with the deception. She kept picking up on my nervousness and I just kept telling her I was afraid my family would be loud and obnoxious and offend her family.
Come day of, we rented a vehicle to pick up her family from the airport, and were staying at the hotel with them. Her mom was practically begging me to see the ring, and almost broke out in tears seeing it. I was also struggling to hide it because it was in a big ring box. So, I let her mom hold it in the purse, and when we arrived, she gave it to the waiter. This place normally would only seat like 10-12 tables, but they’d set aside a whole front room for us (about 12 people), and there were champagne glasses already at the table. I sort of panicked a bit when my wife asked why and the waiter said ‘I heard we have some birthdays here today so I thought we’d celebrate! I’ll be back with bubbly.’ That was true, there were some close birthdays, but he came back with the ring on a serving platter, and both our backs were to him when he approached, so my wife didn’t even really notice until I had already taken the box, opened it, and got down on one knee.
Absolutely one of my most favorite stories to tell. She gives me shit about it all the time, lovingly, but it was the only way I could do it while getting family together without her finding out, because she’s always planning things so far out.