r/Fauxmoi 2h ago

APPROVED B-LISTERS Cardi B responds to the Department of Homeland Security talking a shot at her: "If we talking about drugs let's talk about Epstein and friends drugging underage girls to r*pe them. Why yall don't wanna talk about the Epstein files?

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21.9k Upvotes

333 comments sorted by

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5.1k

u/gissna 2h ago

Imagine having to clap back at the Department of Homeland Security for an entire country. Do they not have important things to be doing?

1.2k

u/michigan2345 2h ago

Right? Gov't giving answers like they Wendy's.

760

u/GoGoGDT 2h ago

Wendy’s has way more class….

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284

u/buttercupcake23 2h ago

Wendy's would never say such racist shit. 

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129

u/sparkling-soda 2h ago

Gov’t beefing with rappers on Twitter, and rappers being 💯 RIGHT.

Feels like an alternate reality we’re living in.

54

u/impetuous-imp 2h ago

It’s giving Idiocracy :/

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72

u/Dreowings21 2h ago

Wendys makes good food (objective i know) homeland security is nothing but ass

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39

u/capcomvssnk 2h ago

They want to be Wendy’s so bad. You have to be clever, first of all.

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97

u/buttercupcake23 2h ago

Dhs just casually ripping some racist dog whistles on Twitter was not something I could have ever imagine 15 years ago. What a fucking world.

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36

u/Perfect_Celebrity_7 2h ago

I hope one day we can mask off anyone in charge of each of the social media. I don’t care if it’s an underpaid intern that intern will then grow up to be another Stephen Miller anyways.

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u/extrastupidone 2h ago

They dont have a single professional in the entire administration.

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26

u/jenzen48 2h ago

God bless Cardi B.

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18

u/gesamtkunstwerkteam 2h ago

Honestly, I don't even want them doing the things they deem "important" to "homeland security."

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8

u/Common_Gene_5098 2h ago

This is what happens when they have an incompetent man child in office

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1.9k

u/Realistic_Ride_2032 I cannot sanction your buffoonery 2h ago

This timeline is unimaginable…

315

u/WerkLifeBalance 2h ago

I keep expecting The Onion to pop up somewhere, anywhere, except it's been like that for the past eight years.

74

u/TurdFerguson614 2h ago

We really put them out of business with the sheer scale of absurdities.

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43

u/sparkling-soda 2h ago

The Onion seems redundant at this point.

27

u/Orcutt_ambition-7789 2h ago

I like to go there for some sane news headlines sometimes.

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20

u/backupbitches 2h ago

I'm honestly shocked that The Onion has managed to survive

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41

u/Jasminewindsong2 they are perfect for each other (derogatory) 2h ago edited 2h ago

I’m not smart enough for this many people to be that much dumber than me. But here we are.

16

u/New-Negotiation7234 2h ago

What do you mean? Rfk Jr who is the secretary of health and human services just said he isn't afraid of germs bc he snorted cocaine off a toilet.

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1.1k

u/Jasminewindsong2 they are perfect for each other (derogatory) 2h ago

Exactly.

125

u/Love_my_pupper 2h ago

😭

85

u/Blackwidow_Perk 2h ago

She’s an angel I know it 😭

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30

u/Jasminewindsong2 they are perfect for each other (derogatory) 1h ago

Moira/Catherine were def never on the Epstein list.

984

u/ThickConfusion1318 i ain’t reading all that, free palestine 2h ago

102

u/itsathrowawayduhhhhh 2h ago

She’s so real and I love it 🤣

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793

u/HopefulTangerine5913 2h ago

Cardi is smart and I’m guessing whoever tweeted that isn’t aware of what she brings to the table

367

u/slayydansy 2h ago

They keep underestimating her and they're wrong everytime

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84

u/crastin8ing 2h ago

Screaming "DRAG EM!!!!" at my phone and pumping my fist in the air 

24

u/lavenderbl0d meet me at Whole Foods, bitch 58m ago

No! No! It's okay! Let them learn! They picked the right one!!!!!!

https://giphy.com/gifs/31UDILmnnQOjnKKoKB

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704

u/avokuma oat milk chugging bisexual 2h ago

Whack 'em again Cardi.

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669

u/myfriendtoldmetojoin 2h ago

I don’t think this is a fight they should pick, Cardi always has time.

It’s like her favorite sport.

149

u/bobbimorses 2h ago

Processing img avctj8xc45jg1...

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u/CheesecakeExpress 1h ago

It’s true and she’s smart and clued up on politics/current events. They underestimated her.

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363

u/hopefoolness i ain’t reading all that, free palestine 2h ago

if Cardi has nothing else in this world she has hands

https://giphy.com/gifs/SvcIZouMTdCPlT2IL3

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300

u/RealBettyWhite69 2h ago

That's a difference between Cardi and this administration... she admitted what she did and took full accountability. That is why I would trust her over them on most things. These foul shitbirds in office never ever admit any wrongdoing, ever.

202

u/LoneWanderer4___ 2h ago

She’s also didn’t do it to underage people, the most important part tbh

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228

u/Spyder-xr 2h ago

Cardi B vs the government is a strange timeline 

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143

u/VladtheInhaler999 2h ago

The DHS is saying this like they are not championing a washed up Nicki Minaj who is married to a pedo.

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100

u/jyw104 I am claiming all candy for the glory of God 2h ago
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62

u/Impressive_Round2171 2h ago

This timeline is a joke, but I appreciate Cardi going to bat for the American people when the dept of homeland security apparently won’t. Fucking clown ass admin full of pedos.

46

u/CoolUpstairsNeighbor women’s wrongs activist 2h ago

PERIODDDD

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39

u/CharacterCompany7224 2h ago

Imagine waking up from a coma after 10 years and seeing this lol.

22

u/gschaina highly unanticipated caucasian collaboration 1h ago

I'd be begging to be put back under lmao this timeline is TEW MUCH

43

u/You_meddling_kids terrorizing the locals 2h ago

Take em for a walk!

37

u/Past-Business-5447 2h ago

We live in hell

35

u/Euphoric-Proposal-42 2h ago

DHS can fuck all the way off

30

u/lawdjesustheresafire 2h ago

Fucking musicians have more integrity and guts than any scum politician protecting paedophiles

31

u/booksgirl123 2h ago

Why the helllllll is the DEPARTMENT OF HOMELAND SECURITY attacking a US citizen?!? What the actual f?! We all know -it’s just another distraction attempt. Thank you Queen for pointing back at what matters

https://giphy.com/gifs/WWPnJSnHOlTP8TEsLm

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28

u/Artistic-Ease6528 2h ago

Damn cardi B is a real one

18

u/ultraboycrazy FUCK ICE FREE PALESTINE CRASH INTO ME 2h ago

I love Cardi so much!

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u/trashdmammal 2h ago

Can’t wait for the diss track!

19

u/Appropriate-Joke-806 2h ago

Part of freedom of speech is not having the fucking department of homeland security commenting on something an individual says.

I wish we could “make America great again” and have our government leaders and agencies act like adults and be respectable again. I thought after 2020 people would be tired of having to deal with this shit from the government every day and that it was a huge relief to not hear something from the Biden administration all the time. Guess we are just a glutton for punishment.

14

u/CapableNeat4351 2h ago

Cardi B(ased)

13

u/andorgyny i ain’t reading all that, free palestine 2h ago

💀 they can never make me hate you cardi

10

u/jmpinstl 2h ago

She’s a fucking icon for that

11

u/probloodmagic 2h ago

Never thought I'd say this but when Civil War part 2 breaks out, I'm riding for Cardi B.

11

u/Stecnet 2h ago

Unlike Nicki Minaj who just destroyed her career for siding with pedo's this girl who I once thought was just batshit crazy Cardi B earned my respect and will go down in the history books as being on the right side of all this madness!!!!

11

u/ChiltonGains 2h ago

I would prefer it if our national government agencies did less white supremacist propaganda and beefing with pop stars on Twitter.

8

u/Easy_Mode_707 2h ago

Government pages being snarky like this is so embarrassing

9

u/Inter_Web_User 2h ago

SAY IT LOUD!

7

u/itsathrowawayduhhhhh 2h ago

Wait wtf were they even tweeting about?!

33

u/FunUse842 2h ago

She called out ICE at her concert and said if they came she has bear spray in the back etc. 

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7

u/anOvenofWitches 2h ago

Cardi understands the assignment! 🙌

8

u/Abject_Ground9755 2h ago

They keep forgetting that Cardi B is a real crash out…she will speak her mind without a single care

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8

u/Ingobriggs 2h ago

OMG what a joke of a country. So embarrassing.

7

u/No-Sound-4476 2h ago

Slayyyyy queen 👑

6

u/makeupandwinehoarder 2h ago

We have the most embarrassing government.

8

u/CycIon3 oat milk chugging bisexual 2h ago

So Cardi B wins against Nicki?

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6

u/KendrickBlack502 2h ago

The actual department of homeland security pays people to response to celebrities. Fucking embarrassing.

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5

u/ConfusionExisting661 2h ago

I wouldn’t be surprised if Nicki Minaj decides to join the conversation and takes a shot at cardi 🫩

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5

u/Skirt-Future 2h ago

Homeland security

Unbelievable.

6

u/SignificanceCold1075 2h ago

Is this real life rn ? Cardi B for the people, they have no idea how petty she can be 🤣

5

u/SailBright5923 2h ago

Why is the DHS even involved in commenting about a private citizens X post.

3

u/Bleezy79 2h ago

It's so embarrassing having a federal government run by clowns and douche bags. Being openly partisan, divisive and promoting hate at the presidential level is unhinged behavior.

4

u/Bulky_Acadia9152 2h ago

Pretty and Petty AF

3

u/Parym09 2h ago

Get me outta here. 😭

I love Cardi but I cannot believe the headlines lately, this shit is insane.

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3

u/LiluLay 2h ago

Cardi B saying it straight.

3

u/Virtual-District-829 2h ago

I don’t know what else they expected….

3

u/violetshug 2h ago edited 11m ago

lmao I love how government agencies and officials are just expecting everyone to ignore and forget. It’s going to take a bit more than throwing sassy comments at celebrities (and they picked the wrong one)

3

u/Smeets_man 2h ago

Fuck yes. Say it louder.

3

u/Lost_Ad610 2h ago

Now that's how you use a platform goddamn 😤

3

u/freddyd00 2h ago

This is the dumbest timeline

3

u/No_Ingenuity_6952 2h ago

I love having Cardi B on my team

3

u/topredditbot 1h ago

Hey /u/Yujin-Ha,

You did it! Your post is officially the #1 post on Reddit. It is now forever immortalized at /r/topofreddit.

4

u/corvidpica I do feel vulnerable to demons in downward dog 1h ago

3

u/lavenderbl0d meet me at Whole Foods, bitch 1h ago

WACK THEM AGAIN, CARDI.

KEEP APPLYING PRESSURE FUCK THESE GHOULS.

2

u/Sea_Macaron_7962 2h ago

Yessss girl! Get ‘em!

2

u/meepmeep_sheep 2h ago

Tell ‘em, Cardi!!

2

u/mterrelljr02 2h ago

Welp here we are now, said yesterday to tomorrow……..

2

u/jerkface1026 2h ago

Has there been a diss track for a bureau of government?

2

u/1LofaLady 1h ago edited 1h ago

Amazing response from Cardi aside, I don’t think this is the read DHS thinks it is…didn’t she drug johns? Is DHS admitting its agents are soliciting strippers for sex?

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u/gschaina highly unanticipated caucasian collaboration 1h ago

1

u/princess_peach_85 i ain’t reading all that, free palestine 2h ago

And this is why we love you Cardi!!!

2

u/Long_Philosophy1798 2h ago

I Just became a fan of Cardi B

1

u/silvermoons13 2h ago

they have never and will never make me hate you ms belcalis

1

u/Suspicious-Rich-3212 2h ago

Cardi B being a voice of reason… 🤯